Mother, have you seen my shoes? Those new ones with the buckles on the sides?

Well, I don’t think crying will help us find my shoes. Remember, they were going to be my first pair. Now, they’re gone. Come to think of it, what have you done with most of my clothes? And my toys?

Why’s the crib in pieces, leaning against the wall like that? You know if I pull on them, I could really get hurt. Mommy…

Who’s that on the phone? What do you mean, you “want to take out a classified ad”?

Wait, you’re selling what?